The only hiccup was that nobody told me anything about the clitoris. We were shown a film about gonorrhea and another shocker titled To Janet A Son. When I found out how it worked, I was so freaked out over the fact that someday I might have to do this, and I cried for a long time. My gathering of the facts was random and sporadic.
The only hiccup was that nobody told me anything about the clitoris. Stephen King taught me more about sex than my parents ever would. We spit in the river and so we were sent to time out. He was kind of hilarious, thinking back on it now. I ended up explaining periods and everything to you before you even started kindergarten! For many years, I thought sperm might contain dry nutty bits, like cereal. I was like, no thanks, not for me. While everyone else explored the creek behind our house, my cousin and I sat in the fort and she asked me if I know where babies come from. Like, he went wayyyy to far. However, after a few weeks of standing around with my knickers at my ankles, I realized all the bottom flashers were girls and all the onlookers were boys. So one of my…more blunt friends tried to explain it. My gathering of the facts was random and sporadic. They were never the type to directly lie to me, so I got the whole story the next day, when I regained my composure and asked about it. So, I learnt nothing from this exercise. Man, I reread that book like 8 times. We used to sneak Playboys to our tree fort and look at them together. I resorted to pretending to be a lot more worldly-wise than I actually was, sneering at the uninitiated: I think I figured out most everything else on my own through the Internet and stuff. It sounds painful and sticky. Did the whole condom-on-the-banana thing. Illustration by Daniella Urdinlaiz. Black garbage bag filled with Penthouse and Hustler. But it did the trick. I want them to know, first hand experience what raising kids are like. God, hard to believe that happened so long ago. They would only answer what I would ask, though. But when we were about 15, we had a bit of a shock.
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